Rant Onesie: Cliche Triangles (Warning: Not Geometry)

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Hello, lovely readers, this in Ink_Rights, the lonely writer in the corner (just kidding, though I am on the corner….of my couch). Last week, I gave you guys a short story that you might think is horrible, but let’s be real, can you guys right (yes, spelling mistake and pun intended) any better?

   The answer is probably yes. You guys could probably do a lot better than I can. But, today, is not the day for bashing myself (only on Wednesdays). Today is a day of ranting. It is a day of reviewing. It is a day where the whole world stops at a standstill, and the universe fading before human eyes.

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  Think this is over-dramatic?

  Why not ponder this question further? This is what I wrote:  “--universe fading before human eyes--”

  Now tell me, how many times have you seen this phrase in a novel when the main characters are kissing?

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 Let’s start with something simple. How about, every fantasy book ever that is a romance wannabe? Just in case you didn’t catch my drift, this is my ten years worth of pent up teenage angst feelings, so if you don’t like any of this stuff (warning: you might not like this) feel free to click away onto something more interesting.

 But let’s be real. You guys are going to dive straight in because of this warning.

 Let’s get down to business.

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Focus book:  The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins (Spoiler Alert-- thou arst going to click anyways, so idk the purpose of this )

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  Okay, now I know what you are thinking. How the hell is this amateur blogger even qualified to judge a book that has sold millions around the world and been made into a film adaptation?

 

My answer: …

  That’s right, there is my answer. You are right. Absolutely and 100% right. I am unqualified to judge such a masterpiece. Now I am going to be a Negative Nancy here because I don’t necessarily want to list out my rights to freedom of speech all right here, right now. It’s too hard highlighting then copying then pasting from debate.org. The command c button is especially too far away from my pinky.

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Here is my rash and uneducated opinion and feel free to FIGHT ME…. (actually, please don’t. I only took one month of taekwondo and let’s just say my thighs will never be the same again).

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  Here is my problem. Hunger Games, the whole trilogy, is amazingly well written and in the first book, things are fantastic, not too cliche and not too dramatic. Second book, there is that little spat with Gale being a jealous brooding alpha male after Katniss returns from the Hunger Games. So far, so good. Towards the end of the second and the third is my problem. In the midst of all this and the continuing struggle between the Capitol and District Thirteen, this is my problem.

 Picture yourself in that situation. Freaky crossover version of Snow White’s stepmother as the Capitol president/ dictator is leaving threatening notes with roses, and you are in District Thirteen-- a badass underground vegetable eating district with nuclear missiles but still having very low odds against the rich army of the Capitol (very original btw from the people of the Capitol). You are put in rigorous training even though you feel like shit (and look like it too) and you are called upon to fight another war that would determine the fate of everyone that you love. And (gasp) your baby sister and your mother is in that scenario.

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 Would you really worry about a love triangle about now? I am not criticizing Katniss for thinking about it (hell, I would if I saw a Gale and a Peeta Bread) but it is mentioned too many times. Once or twice is okay, it adds the drama so it’s not just a dull dystopian world. As far as I can tell, the main point is defeating the stupid ass Capitol and their freaky make-up faces (yes, I am in fact looking at you Caesar, not the stabbed one, but the technicolor haired one).

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  But why is romance such a big play here???!!!!

  Love triangles are interesting, I admit, but I am so tired of the Peeta and Gale game. Let’s be honest here. Who would you choose?

 If I were you, I would choose...

Haymitch, duH--

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What is more attractive than a scruffy alcoholic with anger management issues?

 Just kidding.

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 Though this sounds like a Pokemon line.

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“HAYMITCH, I CHOOSE YOU!!!”

  In all essence, this is what it is. Except instead of throwing around Pokeballs, Katniss is throwing around arrows. Katniss is in a very emotional stage, too, right? And it is very clear from day one that the one she loves the most is Prim-- then why is every time she meets Gale, or fried-brains Peeta who turned evil, the romance is turning this into a Mary Sue? Choosing between two boys is not the priority here!!!!

                                                 

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The first book says it all in the title: The Hunger Games.

Now, I’m not sure if I am reading Hunger Games or watching the Bachelorette.

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  Here is my main peeve. In the end, after all the shooting the president of District Thirteen and whatever, this is what comes up. Katniss frickin chooses Peeta.

                                                      

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I wouldn’t say anything if the ENTIRE trilogy has been building up the suspense like that, but Katniss suddenly realizes that Gale helped *indirectly* kill her sister. 

INDIRECTLY.

 Suddenly, she seems to remember that her sister is more important than a love triangle. And she rejects Gale just because of this-- because of this. Now, don’t misunderstand me, I honestly didn’t care who she chose. But to build up that love triangle and making it the center and even overshadowing trying to overthrow the Capitol-- it disappoints me when it just decreases the hype to this.

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 Maybe it’s just me, but it’s too random, like that detail is being shoved in, just so that Peeta Mellark fans can be satisfied (because you know, every girl needs to marry the male main character, right?) I can understand it’s different in real life, but things aren’t read the same way when viewing what actually happened. Writing tone is different from reality speaking tone. 

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Don’t get me wrong, Suzanne Collins is a great author, but it’s just this small detail that ticks me off. Personally, I would have wanted Gale to just be a friend, and for the books to concentrate more on the fight with the capitol. There are more ways of enriching a romance than with a love-triangle. Peeta and Katniss are very different people, and this contrasting between their personalities could have substituted more than enough. Instead, readers get hung up on a cliff and this great work is suddenly reduced to a sniffling romance novel (not saying anything against romance, Jane Austen fans ought to know..)

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  I just felt like there was 90% romance and 10% actual rebellion. The focus is shifted way off course. In my school, kids were constantly debating about Peeta vs. Gale. So here is my question, why is a dystopian book about turning over corruption causing so many people to debate on the romance?

  Think about it.

Or write a song about it.

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If you are asking me, Dory needs to practice her scales... GET IT???

Anyways.

I am now finished with this long rant and I apologize to all of you who got butt hurt, but it is really not my problem----

  "Everyone has the right to freedom of opinion and expression; this right includes freedom to hold opinions without interference and to seek, receive and impart information and ideas through any media and regardless of frontiers."

 

   Ha! I actually did it! I PRESSED THE COMMAND C!!!!

  How’s that for being lazy?

 But in all seriousness, if you got hurt over my opinions, please comment and tell me your own opinions, I will be more than happy to debate. This is a two-way street. You respect my opinion, and I will respect yours.

 Don’t worry, I’m not all that bad, just a bookworm with too many thoughts in her dreamer mind :D

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 Signing off,

 Ink_Rights

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